Dave's Baby Shower
I haven't gotten a chance to tell you that Dave's work gave us a really nice baby shower. Everybody was so sweet and generous.
The shower was organized by Dave's friend Cris.
(Cris holding the bear from Nan)
She got us cupcakes for the shower instead of a cake, which we liked better, and they were so yummy. I was hooked on the strawberry ones. (Dave liked the vanilla!)
They got us the most wonderful gifts. They took up a collection and got us a video camera for our trip from Victor and Karen, Suan, Madeline, Janet, Helen, Jeff (Dave's boss), Bertina, Richard, Kendra, Michelle, Mike, Sanaz, Grant, Nichole, Erica, Paul, John, Alison, Pratima, Jodi, Lori, Scott, Nan, and Cris (who organized the shower).
Some people bought us gifts on their own too.
Lori chipped in for the camera and also got us
(Dave, the Monkee-man, especially loves these monkees!)
5 Little Monkees and their book plus a box of socks that look like Vans (we love Vans), Nan also chipped in and in addition gave us a picture frame and a teddy, Connie gave us a pretty dress from Carters, Erin and Kelly gave us a ride-on pony and a CD they made of songs for baby, Patrick gave us a stroller, and Dave R gave us a baby book of haikus and a play grocery basket of fruit. If you click on the photo of the stroller you should be able to see them all. Sophie, you did really well! Everyone was so generous, and I know it will mean a lot to Sophie to know people cared about her so very much. And also, the video camera we have been wanting to get, but it is tough for us to buy "big ticket" items, and I know Sophie will appreciate the camera a lot. We will have little information ever to give her about the first 9 months of her life, and she may never be able to find or learn any more; for some people who are adopted that information is something they long for, so having lots of video of herself as a baby will, I'm sure, be precious to her. We really can't thank everybody enough for all the kindness they showed us and the very thoughtful gifts. We were overwhelmed.
(And, you know, I'm just one of the ghosts in the machine at my jobs. I told all my deans about my adoption as they had to write employment letters for me and as we may leave for China before the semester ends, but it's not like I mean anything to anyone at those jobs. I'm very replaceable, as all adjuncts are, so, again, it' especially nice to have co-workers and see that Dave is really valued at his job.)
I, personally, was also overwhelmed by walking into their conference room and seeing Sophie. I bet not too many baby showers have a picture of the baby for decoration. She is so pretty, and we love her so much, it was delightful to see her as the star of the room:
We got another great present that day too. Dave's boss Jeff made a truly lovely speech about Sophie. We were doubly lucky in that Jeff was able to produce a simulacrum (a sort-of transcript) for us afterwards (and, considering that he did this off-the-cuff, we are doubly moved and impressed!):
(Jeff stood to make the speech; this photo is just him and Dave's other friend Janet hanging out with us later.)
Thank you to everybody for coming today.
You may have noticed that it has been raining babies here at Zynx lately.
We are up to our knees in new babies!
I think this is the 176th baby shower this month.
This is good since the Zynx mission is, after all, “To provide evidence-based babies….”
My own theory is that the different departments didn’t get the full-time employees (FTEs) that they hoped for in the 2010 budget, and so are going about building their departments organically instead.
The Zynx babies are ALL special! All are so cute. All are so intelligent. All have such promising futures – you just know that these kids will grow up to be scientists, national leaders, and late-nite talk-show hosts.
Another thing all the Zynx babies share is, of course, their middle name….Madeline Zynx Lee, Emily Zynx Tatiyants, etc. (As you know, it is in the small print of our employee contracts that any babies be given that middle name).
While all the Zynx babies are special, the Content Team is especially excited about one baby: Sophie Zynx Yurkovich. The reason we are all especially excited is because Sophie Zynx is especially special.
There are a lot of reasons she is extra special.
For example, the typical special Zynx baby takes 9 months and…what? 6 minutes? And then…BABY! Sophie Zynx, being extra special, took FOUR YEARS. Everyone knows that if you spend longer on something, it turns out to be extra special! For example, if somebody on the street spent 2 hours on Thanksgiving dinner, it might be good. A Zynx person might spend 4 hours on the dinner and it would be special. The Yurovich’s would spend a good 9 hours on it…now that would be an EXTRA-special banquet!
Another example:
In order to get a special Zynx baby home, you need….a car seat. That’s it. They approve the car seat, you drive home and don’t sleep for the next 5 years. Nothing else is required.
To get an extra-special baby requires more. It requires passports. And transoceanic flights. And domestic flights. And rides in Chinese taxis. And a visa! Madeline Zynx didn’t require a visa to go home with Victor and Karen! Sophie Zynx requires a visa! And more airplanes (during which, by the way, Sophie will be sleeping or coo-ing adorably throughout). And LAX. And paparazzi. And a car seat! And a drive up the 405 and through the 405/101 interchange. An extra special baby requires this extra effort.
A special Zynx baby requires…what? The initial 6 minutes, then the hospital stuff, then “here’s the baby”.
An extra special baby requires “Sign here. Initial here. Sign here. And here. And…”. And requires fingerprints. And the FBI. And home visits (luckily the Yurovich’s hid what needed hiding prior to the home visit). Extra special babies require extra-special prep work.
One thing I can almost guarantee, Victor Lee didn’t need to fight for changes in the application of national legislation to get Madeline Zynx! The Yurkovich’s, on the other hand, did! When a law was passed that would have led to a delay in getting Sophie home where she belongs, they launched a national petition campaign that led to getting those who were already in the process at the time of the new law to be grandfathered in under the old law. Extra special babies sometimes require changing laws!
Finally, the first impression that a parent of a special Zynx baby has is “crying and screaming” – a preview of the next 18 to 27 years. The parents also think that the baby is cute…but that is because they are exhausted! They have been “pushing” or have been being yelled at for who knows how many hours. They are tired, so the baby looks cute. But let’s be honest, newborns aren’t that cute! Sometimes they have the conehead thing. Sometimes they have the skin…white…ick…thing. Sometimes, like my niece, they are pulled out by spatulas or hooks or tongs or whatever and so have marks on their skin…not cute! Sophie Zynx, on the other hand, here was everybody’s first impression of her:
(Entire room goes “Ahhhhhhhhhhhh”)
(And they projected this photo of Sophie on the screen)
Exactly! Ahhhhhhhhhh. Sooooo cute! Not crying! This first picture, by the way, was before she knew who her parents were going to be.
This picture soon followed after she found out who her parents are:
(And then they projected this photo of Sophie on the screen.)
That’s a happy baby! If you look closely at this picture (and I’ve looked at it a LOT!), it seems like this is a baby who knows how lucky she is. Think about it! Her mom is a writer WHO WRITES CHILDREN BOOKS! Her dad is a great artist/illustrator/cartoonist who can ILLUSTRATE CHILDREN BOOKS! Her favorite uncle is JEFF BARNHART! The only way she could be any luckier is if her grandpa were Willie Wonka!
All the Zynx babies are special. But this one, for so many reasons, is extra special.
We look forward to Sophie Zynx’s arrival and hope she will be editing content within a few years.
On behalf of Zynx, the Content Team, and the Editorial Team, congratulations David and Di. You will be GREAT parents of this EXTRA special little girl
Aw, even now, when I read it, it makes me cry. What a sweet person "Uncle Jeff" is. We really cannot express how much we appreciated this, and all of the Zynx' kindness and generosity and love. Sophie, your Poppy has a good job!
("Wow Dave," says Dianne, quite mystified, "look at all these lovely gifts! These people really must like you for some reason...." [LOL, I'm just kidding Davey!])
The shower was organized by Dave's friend Cris.
(Cris holding the bear from Nan)She got us cupcakes for the shower instead of a cake, which we liked better, and they were so yummy. I was hooked on the strawberry ones. (Dave liked the vanilla!)
They got us the most wonderful gifts. They took up a collection and got us a video camera for our trip from Victor and Karen, Suan, Madeline, Janet, Helen, Jeff (Dave's boss), Bertina, Richard, Kendra, Michelle, Mike, Sanaz, Grant, Nichole, Erica, Paul, John, Alison, Pratima, Jodi, Lori, Scott, Nan, and Cris (who organized the shower).
Some people bought us gifts on their own too.
Lori chipped in for the camera and also got us
(Dave, the Monkee-man, especially loves these monkees!)5 Little Monkees and their book plus a box of socks that look like Vans (we love Vans), Nan also chipped in and in addition gave us a picture frame and a teddy, Connie gave us a pretty dress from Carters, Erin and Kelly gave us a ride-on pony and a CD they made of songs for baby, Patrick gave us a stroller, and Dave R gave us a baby book of haikus and a play grocery basket of fruit. If you click on the photo of the stroller you should be able to see them all. Sophie, you did really well! Everyone was so generous, and I know it will mean a lot to Sophie to know people cared about her so very much. And also, the video camera we have been wanting to get, but it is tough for us to buy "big ticket" items, and I know Sophie will appreciate the camera a lot. We will have little information ever to give her about the first 9 months of her life, and she may never be able to find or learn any more; for some people who are adopted that information is something they long for, so having lots of video of herself as a baby will, I'm sure, be precious to her. We really can't thank everybody enough for all the kindness they showed us and the very thoughtful gifts. We were overwhelmed.
(And, you know, I'm just one of the ghosts in the machine at my jobs. I told all my deans about my adoption as they had to write employment letters for me and as we may leave for China before the semester ends, but it's not like I mean anything to anyone at those jobs. I'm very replaceable, as all adjuncts are, so, again, it' especially nice to have co-workers and see that Dave is really valued at his job.)
I, personally, was also overwhelmed by walking into their conference room and seeing Sophie. I bet not too many baby showers have a picture of the baby for decoration. She is so pretty, and we love her so much, it was delightful to see her as the star of the room:
We got another great present that day too. Dave's boss Jeff made a truly lovely speech about Sophie. We were doubly lucky in that Jeff was able to produce a simulacrum (a sort-of transcript) for us afterwards (and, considering that he did this off-the-cuff, we are doubly moved and impressed!):
(Jeff stood to make the speech; this photo is just him and Dave's other friend Janet hanging out with us later.)Thank you to everybody for coming today.
You may have noticed that it has been raining babies here at Zynx lately.
We are up to our knees in new babies!
I think this is the 176th baby shower this month.
This is good since the Zynx mission is, after all, “To provide evidence-based babies….”
My own theory is that the different departments didn’t get the full-time employees (FTEs) that they hoped for in the 2010 budget, and so are going about building their departments organically instead.
The Zynx babies are ALL special! All are so cute. All are so intelligent. All have such promising futures – you just know that these kids will grow up to be scientists, national leaders, and late-nite talk-show hosts.
Another thing all the Zynx babies share is, of course, their middle name….Madeline Zynx Lee, Emily Zynx Tatiyants, etc. (As you know, it is in the small print of our employee contracts that any babies be given that middle name).
While all the Zynx babies are special, the Content Team is especially excited about one baby: Sophie Zynx Yurkovich. The reason we are all especially excited is because Sophie Zynx is especially special.
There are a lot of reasons she is extra special.
For example, the typical special Zynx baby takes 9 months and…what? 6 minutes? And then…BABY! Sophie Zynx, being extra special, took FOUR YEARS. Everyone knows that if you spend longer on something, it turns out to be extra special! For example, if somebody on the street spent 2 hours on Thanksgiving dinner, it might be good. A Zynx person might spend 4 hours on the dinner and it would be special. The Yurovich’s would spend a good 9 hours on it…now that would be an EXTRA-special banquet!
Another example:
In order to get a special Zynx baby home, you need….a car seat. That’s it. They approve the car seat, you drive home and don’t sleep for the next 5 years. Nothing else is required.
To get an extra-special baby requires more. It requires passports. And transoceanic flights. And domestic flights. And rides in Chinese taxis. And a visa! Madeline Zynx didn’t require a visa to go home with Victor and Karen! Sophie Zynx requires a visa! And more airplanes (during which, by the way, Sophie will be sleeping or coo-ing adorably throughout). And LAX. And paparazzi. And a car seat! And a drive up the 405 and through the 405/101 interchange. An extra special baby requires this extra effort.
A special Zynx baby requires…what? The initial 6 minutes, then the hospital stuff, then “here’s the baby”.
An extra special baby requires “Sign here. Initial here. Sign here. And here. And…”. And requires fingerprints. And the FBI. And home visits (luckily the Yurovich’s hid what needed hiding prior to the home visit). Extra special babies require extra-special prep work.
One thing I can almost guarantee, Victor Lee didn’t need to fight for changes in the application of national legislation to get Madeline Zynx! The Yurkovich’s, on the other hand, did! When a law was passed that would have led to a delay in getting Sophie home where she belongs, they launched a national petition campaign that led to getting those who were already in the process at the time of the new law to be grandfathered in under the old law. Extra special babies sometimes require changing laws!
Finally, the first impression that a parent of a special Zynx baby has is “crying and screaming” – a preview of the next 18 to 27 years. The parents also think that the baby is cute…but that is because they are exhausted! They have been “pushing” or have been being yelled at for who knows how many hours. They are tired, so the baby looks cute. But let’s be honest, newborns aren’t that cute! Sometimes they have the conehead thing. Sometimes they have the skin…white…ick…thing. Sometimes, like my niece, they are pulled out by spatulas or hooks or tongs or whatever and so have marks on their skin…not cute! Sophie Zynx, on the other hand, here was everybody’s first impression of her:
(Entire room goes “Ahhhhhhhhhhhh”)
(And they projected this photo of Sophie on the screen)Exactly! Ahhhhhhhhhh. Sooooo cute! Not crying! This first picture, by the way, was before she knew who her parents were going to be.
This picture soon followed after she found out who her parents are:
(And then they projected this photo of Sophie on the screen.)That’s a happy baby! If you look closely at this picture (and I’ve looked at it a LOT!), it seems like this is a baby who knows how lucky she is. Think about it! Her mom is a writer WHO WRITES CHILDREN BOOKS! Her dad is a great artist/illustrator/cartoonist who can ILLUSTRATE CHILDREN BOOKS! Her favorite uncle is JEFF BARNHART! The only way she could be any luckier is if her grandpa were Willie Wonka!
All the Zynx babies are special. But this one, for so many reasons, is extra special.
We look forward to Sophie Zynx’s arrival and hope she will be editing content within a few years.
On behalf of Zynx, the Content Team, and the Editorial Team, congratulations David and Di. You will be GREAT parents of this EXTRA special little girl
Aw, even now, when I read it, it makes me cry. What a sweet person "Uncle Jeff" is. We really cannot express how much we appreciated this, and all of the Zynx' kindness and generosity and love. Sophie, your Poppy has a good job!
("Wow Dave," says Dianne, quite mystified, "look at all these lovely gifts! These people really must like you for some reason...." [LOL, I'm just kidding Davey!])
posted by chad-roscoe at 8:22 AM
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